Many of you know we experienced a miscarriage the day after Christmas this last year. God gave us grace to find purpose in that miscarriage. You can read about that here.
We chose the name Addie for our precious unborn child and have taken to referring to that baby with the pronoun “she”. Addie’s due date was today, September 1, 2015.
Miss Ryan and Daddy blew out the candle.
Shortly after our loss, I knew I wanted to do something special in commemoration on her due date. We have not shied away from speaking and writing about her, her existence, and her purpose, and we have found these actions helped tremendously in our grieving process. I didn’t want to sweep her existence under the rug, so to speak, and pretend like she never existed. Her big sister talks about her at times. A couple of weeks ago, while cooking dinner, my sweet Ryan Rachelle said out of the blue, “Momma, Addie Heaven.” Stunned, I followed with, “Umm, what?” She insisted this time, “Addie heaven!” “That’s right, my girl. Addie is in heaven.” That was the end of that. She just wanted to let me know. Yesterday, a similar scene unfolded.
Our attempt at getting a family picture with the balloons. It was very windy!
Therefore today, on Addie’s due date we wanted to do something simple to celebrate her existence. We purchased 3 mini cakes from Nothing Bundt Cakes, lit a candle, and did a balloon release with just the three of us. We explained to her that we were going to let go of the balloons and that they would go to heaven for Addie to play with. Don’t worry, we purchased an extra balloon for Miss Ryan to keep so she didn’t meltdown at the release of her favorite thing in the world!
In addition, at this time we decided to begin a daily routine of performing Bible time with Ryan, in order to train her in the habit and importance of spending time with God. We wanted to begin with the Proverb of the day, and seeing as today is the 1st, it seemed like a good day to begin.
Our precious Addie was created in God’s own image. For whatever reason, He saw fit to take her to heaven earlier than we would’ve chosen on our own. She is a little sister to Ryan Rachelle and a big sister to Lawson Ford, who is due in about 5 weeks. Generally, we are no longer sad when we speak of her. She had great purpose, and she served it. She continues to serve it every time someone asks us for encouragement after suffering a loss of their own.
Have you suffered miscarriage? If so, how did you deal with it? Did your family ever celebrate that life in any way? Everyone has their own way of dealing with things such as this. I’m curious to hear yours.